


Brother's Keeper

by theskywasblue



Category: Saiyuki
Genre: Dark, M/M, Unhappy Ending
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-05-21
Updated: 2010-05-21
Packaged: 2017-10-09 15:22:19
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 509
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/88836
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/theskywasblue/pseuds/theskywasblue
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>He said I reminded him of you</p>
            </blockquote>





	Brother's Keeper

You always were his favourite, you know."

The pain was like nothing else he had ever felt before – so intense it was exquisite. He could feel the heat of his own blood running down his side, cooling as it pooled beneath him, and with every breath he took he could hear the wet gurgle in his chest, feel the tiny stab of his broken rib in his lung.

His head lulled back against the cool stone wall and a slow grin spread over his face.  
_Was this what you felt Koumyou? I never knew._

"Are you going to kill me – or would you like me to beg for mercy first?"

"This is mercy."

He laughed – it hurt – but what was life without a little pain, really? He could taste the flecks of blood on the back of his tongue.

_Are you sure you pulled him out of the river Koumyou? Are you absolutely sure?_

It was hard to reconcile the man sitting across from him with the spindly brat Kouryuu raking leaves in the temple courtyard. The expression was the same though – all holier-than-thou – the face of a boy who knew, just _knew_ he was daddy's favourite.

"All I wanted was a fair chance."

He had fought for it, pleaded, laid down everything, and it was never enough. Always _Kouryuu, Kouryuu, Kouryuu_ – the endless refrain of his own inadequacy. The second born would never live up to the first; that was why brothers fought, in the end, just to be noticed.

Life was collateral damage, the end result of a single, thoughtless act. Just like death, really. He had never thought that it would all end the way that it did; a miscalculation on his part.

_No – no I always knew he would die for Kouryuu – always knew it. So then why?_

Not a miscalculation then, but a mislaid hope that in the end he would be worth more, that Koumyou's final act would prove he was better – that he was the good son.

"I just wanted him to love me, the way he loved you."

"You're a fool."

_True._

"So what now? What now Kouryuu – I guess…there is no more now for me, is there?"

"No, not really."

"We are brothers," his voice cracked, "You and I."

"You think so?"

He licked his lips, even though his mouth was dry, "But you were always the favourite – the prodigal son – little Kouryuu…"

"Don't blame me because you fucked everything up."

He laughed, and this time it didn't hurt – a good sign, or maybe a bad one. Everything was starting to become hazy, around the edges, and his body felt far away. Somewhere nearby he could hear the crows calling.

_This – this is what I was waiting for Koumyou – this moment – this freedom. Nothingness._

"He said I reminded him of you – but I don't see it. We're nothing alike you and I."

"I'm not sure," Kouryuu took a long drag of his cigarette, blew the smoke in a ring towards the ceiling, "we both loved him, didn't we?"

-End-


End file.
